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When I was still in high school my psychiatrist diagnosed me with Bipolar disorder because, apparently, it isn't normal for a 17-year old to sneak out of his parents house at 10 o' clock on a Friday night and, without telling anyone, drive 6 hours to Chicago in order to sell a manuscript that he hasn't written to publishers he's never met. In retrospect, it was actually a gigantic blessing that I turned out to be constitutionally incapable of contemporaneously drinking and even pretending to be a productive member of society, as it got me into treatment sooner.Īnother reason why I may be so ineffective a drunk is the fact that I, like roughly 43% of all Americans with a substance use disorder, also suffer from a co-occuring mental illness. At the time, it was infuriating how often my life would cave in on itself and force me to adopt a temporary guise of sober responsibility.

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My using history is really a series of uninteresting 1 to 2 months spurts in which I would give up most of my earthly responsibilities in lieu of getting fucked up, only to realize that I'd turned my entire world into a shambles and needed to jump back on the wagon for a spell. I am what you might call a “dysfunctional alcoholic.” A dysfunctional alcoholic is not someone who is particularly bad at being an alcoholic-I think I was pretty solid on that front, at least if speed is any indicator-but rather someone who is bad at being a functional member of society whilst drinking. Luckily for me, my path through alcoholism and addiction involved jumping out of the blocks quick and falling flat on my face almost immediately thereafter. The grandmother who left me her Big Books as heirlooms. The grandmother whose liver gave out before I was born. I wanted the same thing that my grandmother did. I wanted to feel all of the atoms in my body being slowed to a turgid crawl, blocking up my veins and capillaries until the blood coursing through me moved at the pace of a lazy river. I had wanted it before I even knew what it was that I was wanting. Whether it was drink or drugs, the only thing I was looking for was a respite from myself. I could sit in quiet and not be forced to listen to the whirring drone of my own dysfunction. For a brief few hours, I was impervious to my own thoughts. Not nothing in an empty way, but nothing in a weightless way, as if the physical properties that guided the rest of existence no longer applied to me. The part of it that made me feel like nothing. UHS is an Equal Opportunity Employer and as such, openly supports and fully commits to recruitment, selection, placement, promotion and compensation of all individuals without regard to race, color, religion, age, sex, national origin, disability status, genetics, protected veteran status or any other characteristic protected by federal, state or local laws.Sometimes I miss it. Universal Health Services is a holding company. Any reference to employment at UHS or employees of UHS refers to employment with one of the subsidiaries of Universal Health Services, Inc.Īll employment at “UHS' is with one of the subsidiaries of Universal Health Services, Inc., including its management company, UHS of Delaware, Inc. Further, the terms 'we,' 'us,' 'our' or 'the company' in such context similarly refer to the operations of the subsidiaries of Universal Health Services, Inc. Any reference to 'UHS' or 'UHS facilities' including any statements, articles or other publications contained herein which relates to healthcare or management operations is referring to Universal Health Services' subsidiaries. All healthcare and management operations are conducted by subsidiaries of Universal Health Services, Inc. is a holding company that operates through its subsidiaries. UHS is a registered trademark of UHS of Delaware, Inc., a subsidiary of Universal Health Services.